The Mysterious World of Boys... May 28, 2008

Growing up with all sisters I have never really understood boys.  When I married Daddy there were a lot of things that shocked and surprised me.  When we were matched to Heather and I realized I was going to be a mommy to a boy I wondered what other surprises lay in store for me.  I thought they'd be so apparent that I'd encounter them from the very beginning.  Little did I know that was true for a few things, but just recently I'm discovering so much more about what it means to raise a little boy and be in a little boy's world.

I read something in a parenting magazine yesterday that was one of those shockers for me, but it was an epiphany too and I think I understand you a little better.  I read that, "In general, boys are more rambunctious and aggressive...Taking risks lights up the pleasure centers of their brains."  "Ah, ha!  I get it!" I said to myself.  You see, I am the opposite of aggressive; I avoid it if at all possible and don't enjoy it at all.  I'm the kind of girl who when I do any physical sport associated with risk, like skiing, waterskiing, rock climbing, I get it over with as soon as I can an I stay in the middle of the wake, try my hardest not to fall, and only like to climb in gyms where everything is manufactured.  Adrenaline is not my friend, it is an unpleasant warning sign that I'm about to lose my life or something that I term close to it.  Boys, I understand now, enjoy that feeling.  Your Daddy even told me he did!  I guess that explains why he thinks that climbing Mount Everest is an accomplishment to be proud of and why I think people who do it are selfish and unnecessary risk takers.  Boys think it's fun to test the limit and experience danger.  Wow.

And it makes so much sense about you.  In the past few weeks you have really turned on the two-year-old need to be independent, to do things your own way, and to be aggressive.  Suddenly, to my horror, you've been turning sprinkler parts into guns, you instinctively know that sticks can be play-pretend swords, and after we had a little "fight" yesterday about having to sit in your car seat and you were mad you said in your frustration, "I fight people!".  What!?  My little, tiny, sweet, affectionate baby wants to fightpeople?  I even asked you Dad last night what I was doing wrong that all this was happening.  I think the key is that you have come pre-programmed to be this way.  You have always been very "boy" and that is still true.  I need to find ways for you to get your aggression out in good ways instead of trying to suppress it completely and I need to let you explore and take risks.  Oh, the world of boys...this is going to be interesting.